MR. POLITE :D

even just looking at you.. FEELS WRONG. 

walang mag rereact. kanta yan! nagkakanta lang ako. hehe. i feel so busy right now, kaya tinatamad akong magkwento ng aking buhay. and also because i have my 2 diaries already! which i bring in school, so when i write there, it feels weird for me to write it here too! lol.

next week is our finals. and i really do hope na mataas ang makuha ko. i hate 3. please give me a 2 in algeb?? puh lease! ahehe. joke.

my class tomorrow is 8AM because i have a make up class in trigonometry. which i think SUCKS. because why the heck is it so early??? i mean duh! im an evening student, so why the hell do i have to wake up as early as that?? GRR. this really makes me mad. >_<

my day went fine today. my wagon of happiness is down to 7. sucker. this is not the lowest i’ve got, but it still LOW. its just that things in my life have been so bizarre and hassle. there are times i really want to give up, but i can’t because of a lot of reasons. reasons that sometimes doesnt seem reasonable enough for me, but i still continue to think everything that happens to me, to US, are all for the best. God has a plan for me, and i’ll live and go on to find that out. its just so depressing that even the rain can’t cheer me up. i feel so down.

a friend texted me btw, 

i can’t decide if i should believe this. hehe.maybe i should? para masaya lang. lol

(NOTE: my wagon of HAPPINESS has 20 pebbles. 20 being the happiest, and 0 being the saddest, i can call it the wagon of sadness too, but i didnt because i wanted to be optimistic ) – i got this from stargirl, its a book. very nice

all right-y. its almost 2am. and i SHOULD wake up 6:30am ater. whoosh. NIGHT.

you know I LOVE YOU right?

i got this from halley.i.ph. hope she doesnt mind if i post it here too. its just that, i really love it, and it struck me A LOT. and it made me cry. really. 

A LOVE STORY 

One day, I woke early in the morning to watch the sunrise. Ah the beauty of God’s creation is beyond description. As I watched, I praised God for His beautiful work. As I sat there, I felt the Lord’s presence with me.

He asked me, “Do you love me?”

I answered, “Of course, God! You are my Lord and Saviour!”

Then He asked, “If you were physically handicapped, would you still love me?”

I was perplexed. I looked down upon my arms, legs and the rest of my body and wondered how many things I wouldn’t; be able to do, the things that I took for granted.

And I answered, “It would be tough Lord, but I would still love You.”

Then the Lord said, “If you were blind, would you still love my creation?” How could I love something without being able to see it? Then I thought of all the blind people in the world and how many of them still loved God and His creation.

So I answered, “Its hard to think of it, but I would still love you.”

The Lord then asked me, “If you were deaf, would you still listen to my word?” How could I listen to anything being deaf?

Then I understood. Listening to God’s Word is not merely using our ears, but our hearts.

I answered, “It would be tough, but I would still listen to Your word.”

The Lord then asked, “If you were mute, would you still praise My Name?”

How could I praise without a voice? Then it occurred to me: God wants us to sing from our very heart and soul. It never matters what we sound like. And praising God is not always with a song, but when we are persecuted, we give God praise with our words of thanks.

So I answered, “Though I could not physically sing, I would still praise Your Name.”

And the Lord asked, “Do you really love Me?”

With courage and a strong conviction, I answered boldly, “Yes Lord! I love You because You are the one and true God!”

I thought I had answered well, but God asked, “THEN WHY DO YOU SIN?”

I answered, “Because I am only human. I am not perfect.”

“THEN WHY IN TIMES OF PEACE DO YOU STRAY THE FURTHEST? WHY ONLY IN TIMES OF TROUBLE DO YOU PRAY THE EARNEST?”

No answers. Only tears.

The Lord continued: “Why only sing at fellowships and retreats? Why seek Me only in times of worship? Why ask things so selfishly? Why ask things so unfaithfully?”

The tears continued to roll down my cheeks.

“Why are you ashamed of Me? Why are you not spreading the good news? Why in times of persecution, you cry to others when I offer My shoulder to cry on? Why make excuses when I give you opportunities to serve in My Name?”

I tried to answer, but there was no answer to give.

“You are blessed with life. I made you not to throw this gift away. I have blessed you with talents to serve Me, but you continue to turn away. I have revealed My Word to you, but you do not gain in knowledge. I have spoken to you but your ears were closed. I have shown My blessings to you, but your eyes were turned away. I have sent you servants, but you sat idly by as they were pushed away. I have heard your prayers and I have answered them all.”

DO YOU TRULY LOVE ME ?”

I could not answer. How could I? I was embarrassed beyond belief. I had no excuse. What could I say to this? My heart had cried out and the tears had flowed, I said, Please forgive me Lord. I am unworthy to be Your child.”

The Lord answered, ” That is My Grace, My child.”

I asked, ” Then why do you continue to forgive me? Why do You love me so?”

The Lord answered, “Because you are My creation. You are my child. I will never abandon you. When you cry, I will have compassion and cry with you. When you shout with joy, I will laugh with you. When you are down, I will encourage you. When you fall, I will raise you up. When you are tired, I will carry you. I will be with you till the end of days, and I will love you forever.”

Never had I cried so hard before. How could I have been so cold? How could I have hurt God as I had done?

I asked God, “How much do You love me?”

The Lord stretched out His arms, and I saw His nail-pierced hands. I bowed down at the feet of Christ, my Saviour. And for the first time, I truly prayed.

this made me realize lots of things about life, love, and about Daddy God.hope it made you realize a lot of things too.

GOODNIGHT!

last na to, PROMISE *wink*

naranasan mo na bang maging invisible? ako OO. hindi sa maraming tao, kundi sa isang tao. sa iisang tao na pinaka gusto mong makita ka talaga. taong gusto mong mapansin  ka. siya ang dahilan kung bakit araw araw nagsusuklay ka, nagpapabango, nagpupulbos, naglilipgloss at nagpapaganda. siya yung tao na makita mo lang, kumpleto na araw mo. yung tipong isang ngiti niya lang, masaya ka na, kahit na pa hindi ikaw ang dahilan ng kasiyahan niya. ang hirap maging invisible. lalo na sa taong pilit kang nagpapakita, pero ayaw kang makita.. wala naman akong super powers para maging invisible, pero pagdating sakanya nagiging akong isa sa mga fantastic four. para akong hangin na andyan pero hindi makita. andiyan pero wala naman talaga. 

ngayon ko lang na isip na FAIR nga naman ang buhay, minsan ko nang pinaramdam sa isang tao na invisible siya. siguro kaya bumabalik sa akin ngayon. ayokong gawin yun, pero wala akong magawa. alam kong nandyan siya, di siya ‘invisible’, pero sa isip ko wala siya dahil ayaw ko siyang makita. wala siya dahil yun na ang nakaprogram sa pagkatao ko. masakit isipin na ngayon ganun ang nararamdaman ko. na ganun ang pinapadama sa akin. ou na. fair ang buhay. kaya nga may salitang ‘karma’ diba? nararapat lang siguro ito. ako ang dahilan ng lahat ng ito.

 NIGHT.

there’s no easy way to say goodbye,so baby just say goodnight. :/

have you ever had a dream where in you wish you can just sleep forever?? i did. SO MANY TIMES. but dreams are just chimeras. they are just dreams. dreams that will remain dreams in yer comfy bed.in your sleep.in yer room. 

but the fact is,that’s not really true. because the challenge in life is not to sleep forever, but to make a way for your ‘dreams’ and yer reality to meet. for them to come true. (will YOU ever come true?)

GOODNIGHT LOVE ONES. have a happy dream  

i am not a coward?

after a long week, nag paload na ulit ako. i decided ‘its time’ already. i can no longer pretend that nothing is wrong. i can no longer hide from the truth because whether i like it or i like it (lol) ‘ll have to face my problems and my consequence. 

tonight, i decided to let go of spvm. i texted him and told him the truth. (not about GM of course) i told him i’m not ready to go in a relationship right now, which is technically true. i decided to let him go, though they say you can never let go of someone you never had, i’ll still use the word ‘let go’ because im setting him free. no more sweet messages, no more corny quotes, no more late night calls to say goodnight, no more reminding me to eat at the right time and to rest, no more special someone sending me home, NO MORE SPVM.

i feel sad and happy(??).. not really happy, just.. uhm what’s the right word??? nabunutan ng tinik? yeah thats what i feel. para akong nabunutan ng tinik. i feel free. though i feel sad because i’ll miss those things i just said before. but i believe i can still do them SOON.

i said para akong nabunutan ng tinik because. its been a long week na di ako nagpapa load, i even turn off my phone sometimes, di ako nagbubukas ng ym, nag o-offline ako sa facebook chat. ganun ako kaduwag harapin siya. tinataguan ko talaga siya.. pero syempre, I CAN NEVER HIDE FOREVER, so i chose this night to tell him. di pa siya nag rereply. mahina kase signal. sira ang globe. tinyempo ko talaga yan kase duwag ako na malaman agad sagot niya. lol.

but i told him we can still be friends you know, which i realize now that it sounds so sellfish, because i’m still not letting him go because we are still friends. but whatever. it hurts too on my side. di naman ganun kadaling manakit ng ibang tao. lalu na at taong naging importante sa buhay mo. its hurts as much as it hurts on his side too. 

i just wish that whatever i did tonight,i’ll never regret it in th end.

im dead..

if boredom can kill.. im probably dead right now. lol.

kanina pa akong umaga naka online. first i watched a movie, its titled “IN HER SHOES” starring cameron diaz. great movie. lots of lessons about family, sisterhood, life and all that. i recommend you watch it!

then i played in facebook, the game guess that sketch. so nice and fun. PARA SIYANG YUNG BULAGAAN. someone will draw, then you guess it. hehe. 

and then i got bored, so i decided to reply comments, messages from friendster, facebook and yahoo mail. i receive messages everyday from my friend who is in the US. she just got there last feb. i miss her a lot actually, she’s one of my best friends.

the day before she goes. its a very sad and happy memory.

then i visited blogs and decided to make another blog on www.tumblr.com haha. as they say, the more the merrier right?? lol

that’s my freaky boring life for today. kainip din palang walang pasok no?? hehe. 

i carry your heart, i carry it with my heart Ü

WAYS TO GET OVER YOUR CRUSH !

found this on the google. haha :

WAYS TO GET OVER YOUR CRUSH

  “DO YOU KNOW WHY ITS CALLED CRUSH?? because thats what you feel when they dont feel the same way.. IM SO CRUSHED ”

1. Step 1

   Watch that favorite movie that doesn’t remind you of your crush. And if everything does, then pick a new favorite!(like what?? the grudge 3?? hehe)

2. Step 2

   DON’T compulsively re-read old texts/emails/myspace and facebook messages from your crush. I’m not saying you have to delete them…ok, actually I am. Delete them! Get rid of them! The more you re-read those sweet little notes, you’ll just keep re-opening the wound. I’m sure you’re saying, “But what if we get together later?” If you get together, you’ll get more notes and emails, right? Right. (fine! i’ll delete them now! lol)

3. Step 3

   Try a new hairstyle. Chances are, you’re probably wearing your hair the way it is because your crush liked it that way. Switch it up! Try something new!(weh?? duh! haha)

4. Step 4

   Laugh! Did you know that laughing actually reduces stress? It does! So laugh it up, chances are you did a few silly things during the course of your crush. Like the time you pretended that you’d lost your phone just so you could have a few extra precious seconds to hang around the object of your affection. So gather up your gal pals and have a “remember when you….” upbeat laughing party! (i know right?? hahaha)
   

5. Step 6

   Create a new soundtrack for your life. I know you don’t see anything wrong with listening to all the songs that remind you of your crush on repeat. But it’s just prolonging the agony. So, trade in David Archuleta’s “Crush” for something that actually makes you feel happy!( yeah! my new fave now is HUSH by pcd )

6. Step 7

   Limit your venting sessions with friends. Have somebody who’s a real stickler give you a 5 minute limit and keep you accountable. Don’t wallow.(WHAT? LOL)

7. Step 7

   Find your old life. You know…Your pre-boyfriend routine. Chances are, you probably dumped it. Go get it back. And the next time you have a crush/relationship, don’t ignore your friends. We’ve all had it done to us, and nobody likes to be ignored.

8. Step 8

   Exercise. It’ll increase your endorphins and make you feel better than you would eating ice cream. (i’d rather eat ice cream, thank you )
   

9. Step 9

   Look good when you go outside. No sweats. No old t-shirts of his. Work it like you just stepped out of a fashion magazine. In the words of Deion Sanders: “If you look good, you feel good. If you feel good, you play good. If you play good, they pay good. If they pay good, you live good.” Ok…well maybe that doesn’t exactly apply to your unrequited crush, but when you look good, you do feel good, and feeling good increases the likelihood that other people will pick up on how you feel and want to be around you. People like to be around other positive people. And the more people that are around, the increased chance somebody will be crushing on you soon.

let’s do this! haha. OPERATION CRUSH NO MORE

pwedeng malungkot??

nakakainis naman. text ng text si SPVM. ad i feel so bad for not replying. i still dont have the courage to tell him to “please stop, lets just be friends” .. im such a looser.

and what the heck, im still thinking about GM. bat ba di ako maka get over?? lalu na may small thing na nangyare nung thurs. wala lang naman, inaasar lang naman niya ko. pero kahit ganun lang, syempre dahil im so gaga, kikilig naman ako. aysus. kainis ako. i sound so pathetic. i want to abhor me. tskk

 nag iba ata ng daan si bagyong pepeng. i knew God will not allow something bad happen to us.

though i love the rain a lot, i love our country more. so im really happy, it didnt rain much. 

i know im not for you/>_<

papa dan :D

waaa!. i just check my email–iheartsbob@yahoo.com. and i saw papa dan has emailed me! wee. am so happy. haha. too bad, i just saw it now. nung sept 10 pa kase ata yun eh. i dont check mails kase eh. because that mail is just like my trashcan. its full of emails from facebook, friendster, youtube, myspace and twitter .. etc.

kaya i decided to make another mail. itsceedee@yahoo.com its just exclusively for this i.ph and my blogspot. hehe

BTW, how can i see comments from this i.ph??? because actually the email of papa dan is just a comment in here. but i cant seem to find it here! HELP ME???

ANYWAY, i am currently rewatching my name is kim sam soon aka my lovely sam soon. and my brother scolded me because of that. lol. he said i already watched it and all that. pero paki nya ba?? haha. hyun bin is just so hot i cant help but watch it all over again  

bad bad. tsk

 

i was blog hopping and i found this on stupigity.com

its really not very nice to say things like this especially when there are a lot of people concerning this. but as they say, making a bad thing doesnt necessarily make you a bad person. and yeah, they say too that what one person had done, it doenst mean that people from that particular country are all like that.

this ugly-yubin girl is a korean. i adore a lot of koreans. and this particular korean, i must admit has change the way i see koreans. but i must put in my mind that not all people are the same. and so i’ll just have to forget this. because if i will hate koreans, then i’ll just be like this ugly-yubin. and i dont want that happening to me, right???

PS. ohh my. hyun bin is so hot

bakit ba ako ganito??

ang mga tao sa buhay natin ay para ding mga tao na nakakasabay sa jeep, LRT, bus, train.. at ano pa mang public transportation.

may biglang sasakay na magpapasikip ng buhay mo, at meron din namang sumsakay na papasayahin ka kahit papaano. may mga unang bababa, at aalis dahil tapos na ang role nila sa iyo, at kinakailangan na nilang puntahan ang sarili nilang destinasyon. pero meron din naman na mahuhuling bababa, mga patunay na kahit anong mangyari, kahit na ikaw na mismo ang nang iwan sakanila, hindi ka pa din nila iiwanan.at ang pinakahuli, ang kasabay mong bababa, na makakasama mo, na kahit tapos na ang biyahe sa jeep andiyan parin siya para sayo.

sabi nga nila, people come and people go.. but it doesnt matter how long they have stayed, what’s important is they’ve stayed, even its just for a while.

GOOD AFTERNOON. let’s all pray that we will all be safe. BE SAFE OK?? God is with us.

wake me up when september ends..

wee. WELCOME OCTOBER! i guess we can wake up the man who sang wake me up when sept ends now, can we?? lol.

christmas is coming. i can smell it. (the bibingkas and puto bungbong ) hehe. i just wish everyone will be happy on christmas, just for that day, we’ll find happiness and PEACE within ourselves. its just a wish.. but all wishes come true right??? if you believe they do, THEY WILL ^_^

GOODNIGHT!

who’s viewed me?

good evening. hays. just finish doing my, i mean our visuals for our presentation tom. pagod. pero saya  

anyway.. tinatamad ako mag post eh. hehe. tinatamad ako mag kwento. kase la naman din enta post ko. lol. mag drama ba? haha.

im playing the FORTUNE TELLER GENIUS in fb now. i ask if GM like me, his answer is — “obvious” . what the heck was that?? so confusing. im so pathetic, all i think about is LOVE  LOVE LOVE.. when i know that there are a lot of people suffering right now because of the ondoy tragedy. tsk. bad. bad. and what the hell, kakaalis lang ni ondoy, there’s one coming again???? heck. sometimes i think if this is the sign of the “end of the world prediction on 2012″.. though i dont believe that, because NO ONE except God can say when will be the end of the world, but the signs and the way they present and show it, it seems so real that all will end in 2012. if that’s true. what should we do if we know we only have, lets say a week before the end of everything???

what are the 10 things i should slash must slash WANT to do??

FIRST.- im gonna tell all my family and friends that its been nice knowing them, and im very thankful they are the people i’ve met in my life. love you all. you’ll be in my heart forever. naks!

SECOND. - i’ll pig out! idc bout my diet and all that. im going to eat everything i lurrrrveeeee

THIRD. - im totally gonna admit my HD to GM! if i still like him at that time, which i doubt. hehe. but let’s just say, that whoever i fancy at that time, im going to admit it, and pwede panakaw ng halik??? haha. kidding

FOURTH. - i’ll treat all the street children to mcdonalds! weehee. let’s eat!

FIFTH. - i will kiss all the CALLALILY BAND MEMBERS! especially KEAN! wee.

SIXTH. - this sounds dumb, but i’ll go shopping too! let’s spend all our money! they’re just papers anyways. lol

SEVENTH. - i want to meet roadfill. he’s very cute. very kawaii.

EIGHTH. - im not gonna say a bad word fot that whole week. i promise. cross my heart. *wink wink*

NINTH. - i’ll book a quick flight to europe! i want to see the eifel tower badly.. :/

TENTH. - and on the last day, i’ll be with all my love ones, we will all pray that tomorrow. which is the predict “end” will not be true. amen.